Help Nice-Up Some Words

Hey ya meerkats,

I feel pretty sorry for this guy.  He took on a hard job of making some violent idioms nicer, and it made him feel feelings inside.  Here are the ones he couldn’t muster:

Please make these nicer, won’t you?  Leave your best revisions in the comments.  Some may become illustrated.

-Drew

UPDATE: You guys are amazing.  That is way more nice metaphors than I expected.  I drew some of them just now, and put them into comment-replies.  If I haven’t drawn yours yet, I’m sorry.  There are far too many for ME to muster.

116 Responses to “Help Nice-Up Some Words”

  1. Thrown to the Ball pit!

  2. Emily says:

    It's a man eat mac n' cheese world.

    Give him just enough rope to play cat's cradle.

    High-five some support into him.

  3. Novarri says:

    The straw that massaged the camel's back.

    It's a dog eat dog food world.

  4. M says:

    "Give him just enough rope to tie a pretty bow"

    "Feed some ice cream into him"

    "Thrown to the friendly wolves"

  5. Austin says:

    It's a dog hump dog world

    Hugged some love into him

    Given just enough licorice to enjoy himself

  6. Jonny Briers says:

    The straw that crushed the camel's thirst :D

    Kiss the hand that needs.

    It's a dog love dog world.

    Beat some cents into his pockets.

    Give him just enough rope make an AWESOME HAMMOCK!

    Thrown to the… nope, I just can't beat ball pit.

  7. dyre says:

    Smile some Love into him.

  8. Chris M says:

    The straw that built the camel's hut.

    It's a dog eat treats world.

    Thank the hand that feeds.

    Introduced politely to the pacifist anthropomorphic wolf family.

    Beat some sense-eggs into the batter of his mind.

    For the last one, I like the pretty bow one suggested above.

  9. Dylan Gerety says:

    Beat some EGGS into hiS BIRTHDAY CAKE MX

    ThrowIn' TREATS to the wolves

    Give him just enough BLANKES to HELP HIM FALL ASLEEP

    SHAKE the hand that feeds

    The straw that HELPED the camel DRINK HIS JAMBA JUICE

    It's a dog eatING dog FOOD!

  10. Guðmundur says:

    The straw that decorated the camel's back

    Its a dog pet dog world

    Stroke the hand that feeds

    Thrown to the puppies

    Kiss some sense into him

    Give him just enough rope to pull himself up

  11. GrrlieGeek says:

    The straw that exceeded recommended load tolerance.

    It's a dog-eats-your-lunch world.

    I'll second “Give him just enough rope to tie a pretty bow” It's so Southern!

  12. "The fork that scratched the camel's hard to reach itch."

    "Kiss the hand that blings."

    Ball pit wins. Though "tossed after a tickle fight into the ball pit" has such fluffy connotations.

  13. Namanert says:

    It's a dog eat cake world.

    Give him just enough arms to hug himself.

  14. Emma says:

    "Sing some sense into him"

    "It's a dog eat food world"

    "Give him just enough rope to make a swing"

    "Bite the hand that beats"

    "Thrown to the mattresses"

  15. Kim says:

    The straw that brought the camels back to life!

    It's a dog eat dog treats world.

    Bite the hand that is a hand-shaped piece of candy.

    Throw the wolves a party!

    Feed some spearmints to him.

    Give him just enough rope to build a hammock!

  16. Ethan says:

    The sprint that broke the camel's record

    it's an eat hot dogs world

    wash the hand that feeds

    thrown to the wolve's Tarzan training center

    bestow some cents unto him (picture of a homeless guy)

    give him just enough soap to wash himself

  17. AndrewD says:

    The straw that broke the soda's surface

    Thrown to the trampoline

    Give him just enough rope to tie a knot (I like the pretty bow one, too. =])

  18. admoman says:

    Massage some sense into him

  19. Rudd says:

    In order:

    The factory that manufactured the dude's chocolate

    It's a dude eat chocolate world

    Bite the chocolate that is delicious

    Given chocolate

    Shove some chocolate into him

    Give him just enough chocolate to gorge himself

  20. Megan says:

    the straw that broke the capri-sun package

    tickle the hand that feeds

    snuggle some sense into him

    give him just enough rope to hang a tire-swing

  21. Jen says:

    Thrown to the pillows filled with clouds and covered with perfume.

    Give him just enough money to buy puppies and candy coated candy with.

    Tickle some love and world peace into him.

  22. Salv says:

    Feed the hand that bites. (I like the image)

    Beatbox some sense into him. (?)

  23. Gibson says:

    The STRING that broke THE PINATA RELEASING ALL THE CANDY

    It's a dog eat A TASTY SANDWICH world

    Bite the ICE CREAM that feeds

    Thrown to the PIT OF PILLOWS LIKE THE STUFF THOSE GYMNASTICS PEOPLE USE

    Beat someBODY IN PONG

    Give him enough ARTICHOKES to FEED THE ENTIRE WORLD

  24. Beat some 'taters with him.

    Thrown to the playful kittens.

  25. jeeger says:

    Hug some love into him!

  26. Tom says:

    The straw hat that sat atop the camel's back…because he liked to play bluegrass.

  27. RRBM says:

    It's a dog lick dog world

    Give him just enough nails to hang a picture

  28. alex mangarin says:

    Shake the hand that feeds!

  29. alex mangarin says:

    Thrown to the delightfully playful ducks!

  30. Mark Messing says:

    The straw that broke the camels [smoking habbit]

    It's a [camper] eat [hot dog] world

    [Cite] the [van] that [speeds]

    Thrown to the [Spring Break 1999 TRL Mosh Pit]

    Beat some [Vaccination] into him

    [Don't] Give him just enough rope to hang himself

  31. Henshu says:

    I suggest puppy theme! (entirely based on "thrown to the puppies" which I totally thought of before reading that other comment I think..)

    The puppy that rode the camel's back

    It's a dog make puppy world.

    Lick the hand that feeds

    (seconding thrown to the puppies)

    Hand some puppies to him

    Give him just enough rope to take his puppy for a walk.

    (or second tie a pretty bow as said above, but on a puppy. Puppies with bows are ADORABLE)

  32. Meg says:

    "Beat some eggs into an omelet!"

  33. Sharon Hagel says:

    give him just enough rope to tie around a present.

    Thrown to the fluffy pillows.

    Beat-box some dance into him.

  34. Cherrie says:

    Thrown to the baby duckies.

    The hand/finger that scratched the camel's back.

    Beat some scents into him.

    .

    .

    .

    It's a pacman eat dot world?

  35. Owen says:

    The *old man* that *made hot chocolate.*

    It's a *frog on a log* world.

    *Tickle* the *nun* that *teaches* you.

    *Flown in first class* to the *beach.*

    *Color* some *freckles onto* him

    Give him just enough *cookie dough* to *finish the bake sale.*

  36. Gareth says:

    the straw that *padded* the camels back

    its a dog *lick* dog world

    *shake* the hand that feeds

    thrown to the *pillows*

    *give* some *jelly beans* to him

    give him just enough rope *to skip with*

  37. R says:

    The straw that "tickled" the camel's "tummy"

    Its a dog "hug" dog world

    "Placed gently next" to the "adorable puppy dogs"

    Beat some "eggs" into "the cake batter"

  38. ChrisKet says:

    The Straw that allowed the camel's to drink water from a cup instead of a desert oasis.

    It's a man eat bacon world.

    Bite the bacon that feeds.

    Gently nudged toward the harmless sheep at the petting zoo.

    Beat some scents into him.

    Give him just enough bacon to CONQUER THE WORLD.

    • tamara says:

      to drew: PLEASE read these over i mean,

      The Straw that allowed the camel’s to drink water from a cup instead of a desert oasis

      and

      Gently nudged toward the harmless sheep at the petting zoo.

      is HILARIOUS man

      draw one! DRAW one i say!

      -gently nudged towards drawing a picture of one of these suggestions

      -give him just enough incentive to draw a picture of one of these suggestions

      -trying to convince the hand that draws

      -it's a drew draw non violent idioms world

    • John says:

      It's a boy meets world episode

  39. The straw that helped the camel finish his lemonade

    It's a doggy dog world

    Formally thank the hand that feeds

    Directed to the Great Wolf Lodge

    Hug some cuddles into him

    Give him just enough kittens to love himself

  40. Connor says:

    I think all of these have been done by now but here are mine.

  41. Eirik Gumeny says:

    The "hot, massage-therapy-trained Swede" that "rubbed" the camel's back.

    It's a dog "sniff" dog"'s butt" world.

    "Sneak" some "cents" into hi"s pockets."

    Give him "not nearly" enough rope to hang himself.

  42. LynkStar says:

    "The soup that broke the cat's fever"

    "It's a puppy eat slipper world"

    "Bite the hand that is made of candy"

    "Thrown a frisbee to the wolves"

    "Massage some sense into him"

    "Give him just enough rope to make a swing"

  43. The straw mat that was on the camel's back

    It's a dog eat HOT DOG world! (YUM!)

    Kiss the hand that feeds

    Thrown to the grapefruits

    Massage some sense into him

    Give him just enough rope to tie a knot

  44. neo is one rearrange says:

    Give him just enough rope to make a decorative rope sculpture

  45. its a dog eat hot dog world

    rub the hand that feeds

    give him enough rope for a swing

    lol.

  46. Give him enough lemons to make lemonade

  47. Martha Farag says:

    Kiss the hand that feeds.

    Thrown to the pillows.

    Massage some sense into him.

    Give him just enough rope to tie a knot.

  48. Michy T says:

    The Straw the "Scratched" the Camel's Back

    Its a Dog "Lick" Dog World

    Taste the hand that feeds you

    Grown by the wolves

  49. Dianna says:

    the straw the helped to quench the camels thirst

    it's a people eat spaghetti world

    playfully nibble the hand that feeds

    thrown to the voles

    pleat some cents into hem

    give him just enough rope to do macrame

  50. Ryan says:

    Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day; teach a man to fish and you feed him for life.

    Or my favorite Spanish Idioms :

    "Encerado boca no entran moscas"

    (With a closed mouth, no flies will enter )

    There you go!

    P. S. Thank goodness I showed my friend your Penguin calls, and I found THIS website! Lucky me, huh?