Wait! Don't eat that celery!
Why?
Celery is a negative calorie food. Every stalk you eat robs the universe of energy.
Yeah right! I will eat 1 billion energy!
Nooooo!
One billion celery later...
Well, great, you've prevented the inevitable heat death of the universe in a gazillion years.
Isn't that good?
It would be...
But you caused the cold death of the universe now.
Guest toon by our pal Sanjay from Cowbirds in Love!